Good Sex

Week Six

Spag Bol....oh, who cares.

Contrary to popular female belief, sex isn't just for highdays and holidays, no, it's an integral part of a good marriage relationship.

A couple with a three year old daughter always kept Thursday evenings for each other.  One week the little girls bedroom was being decorated, so she was on a mattress at the end of her parents bed.  Thursday came and they'd had a lovely meal and watched a DVD, naturally when they went to bed the husband started to make his moves "no" the wife protested, "not with Lucy at the end of the bed" "she's asleep, it's fine, please darling" "No I really don't think we should" As the husband got more frustrated he started pleading with her "please, darling, I love you sooo much"  with that, a voice from the end of the bed said "Daddy, when Mummy says no, she means NO".

This is slightly amusing, but with a tinge of sadness.  Even within the marriage relationship "no" can be ignored or not taken seriously, leaving the sexual relationship in tatters, trust broken and a long healing process must begin.

It seems obvious but the thing to come out of this course each week has been communication.  Sex can sometimes be a difficult subject due to many and varied reasons, but if we are to get anywhere near a fulfilling sexual relationship for both husband and wife communication is key.  It is amazing to watch the realisation dawn on your partners face as you share with them your thoughts, fears, hurts, highs, lows and you start to 'get' each other.

I am confident that not only will my marriage be restored, but I actually feel our relationship with each other will be better than it was.  Sometimes you have to hit the bottom of the pit and crawl your way out together to realise that what is waiting at the top is even better - especially if you are reaching out to take God's hand to pull you up.

One couple were heading up to Scotland after the course, they said they would be doing their 'homework' on the plane.  I don't think they had turned ahead to the homework page, because this week it is a practical session......

Building Strong Foundations

Week One

Lasagne and salad, followed by Apple pie and Cream.

No, I haven't taken part in Come Dine With Me, although I absolutely would love to do that, but I'm not a great cook, and my home is usually very unpresentable, so the bit where they rummage through your drawers could be my downfall!

This was the meal that started off our evening at The Marriage Course.  Which I have to say was a valuable experience, of course, it is only week one.  'Good Sex' comes in week 6 - we're all looking forward to that!

You basically watch a DVD, and are given your own individual private manuals.  After the first clip you have 40 mins by yourselves to answer a list of statments in the manual about yourself and your partner, when you've finished you compare with each other, which opens up a dialogue about how completely different your answers are, and shows you up as being completely incompatible.........or the other way round and you realise actually you're not so bad together after all!

It wasn't as patronising as I feared it would be, and so far I would recommend it!

We do have to, at some point this week, find a two hour child free slot in order to do the 'homework' excercises from the manual.

It must have inspired something in my husband, because when we walked home he took a detour, which took us past the tree where we had our first kiss.........awwwww!